Thanks to everyone who submitted an inappropriate texting story. You all made me feel much better about my own love life. Anyway, without further ado, the winning submission:
“A guy with whom I’d had an on-again/off-again relationship before I started seeing my now-husband (meaning that we hadn’t corresponded in any way for several months, maybe a year) managed to text me *on my wedding day* to let me know that he was going to “give me a booty call soon.” I don’t know how I managed not to scream with laughter at the dinner table, with my husband and 25 family members/friends right there. Timing: the secret of great comedy!”
In addition to a husband, this lucky reader, who prefers to be known as Glad That’s Behind Me, is now in possession of a fabulous “super doctor” 
coffee mug. It’s almost a shame she isn’t single, because I’m sure this cup would be a magnet for Portugese-speaking guys in search of a sugar momma. Congrats, GTBM!
Speed Dating Girl 