Don’t say that’s your name

What are you getting for the twelve days of Christmas?

If you answered “a dozen surly-looking atheist dudes,” then we must have sent the same letter to Santa. Actually it was OKcupid.com that bestowed that gift on me. For 12 days, the site has been sending me an atheist to date every day (just by email, not in person), apparently from some misimpression that only religious people are busy shopping, stuffing their faces with chocolate, and getting drunk at office parties.

But maybe they’re right, since from the low-lit, sullen pictures, these guys don’t appear to be having much fun. The photos are nothing compared to the scary screennames, however. I introduce to you a selection of my faith-free dating options: uhohpolio, vagrantimpulse, radiantdecay, deadcheese and last, but certainly not least, cockofspock.

Creepy, no? It’s almost enough to tempt a heathen with conveniently mixed heritage into cruising some church socials and Matzo Balls. (Yes, it is an event, as well as a food.)

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