You’re never too old.

I promised a while ago to check in with LDB. Turns out he’s been too busy working (or so he says) to have his own dating adventures, but he did have a story to tell on a friend.

LDB and the friend, who is a girl, had taken the train to a nearby city for a night out on the town.

“she picked up a guy in a bar. she went home with him. he was 31,” LDB reports. (Before all of you readers who are elderly capitalizing types like me take offense, know that his age is relevant to the rest of the story.)

In the morning, she and LDB hopped the train home, where he discovered that her date had left a gift to remember him by:  “a trail of hickeys on her neck, maybe six or so distinct very obvious hickeys. was so ridiculous-looking i asked her to switch seats on the train home, so i would stop getting distracted and cracking up.”

But he wasn’t the only one with the potential to be distracted. The hickey victim had a bunch of important meetings in the upcoming week, and it was summer so turtlenecks were out. She had also inconveniently recently gotten her hair cut stylishly short.  “she ended up coating her neck in expensive coverup” reported LDB, thus sadly negating the cost savings of accepting those free drinks in the bar.

I have only one thing to say about this: That date sucked!

Ha, ha. No, actually LDB (dedicated Socialist that he is) had his own punchline for the story.  “also, he was a republican.”

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